{"id":1012,"date":"2026-02-03T20:51:13","date_gmt":"2026-02-04T01:51:13","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/discipleshipink.com\/?p=1012"},"modified":"2026-02-03T20:51:13","modified_gmt":"2026-02-04T01:51:13","slug":"dear-19-year-old-me","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/darrenschalk.com\/?p=1012","title":{"rendered":"Dear 19-Year-Old-Me,"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"19<\/a><\/p>\n

Dear 19-year-old-me,<\/p>\n

Last night I played softball for the first time in several years. It wasn\u2019t pretty. And a friend who\u2019s only slightly older than me went down hard with a pulled hamstring. I was not so unfortunate, although my hamstrings are screaming at me today. Which reminds me, who decided to call them hamstrings? I always picture a bunch of pigs playing stringed instruments when I hear that word\u2014like a piggy string ensemble.<\/p>\n

Today I had to take several headshots for some upcoming events. When I had the chance to review them, I was not pleased. I looked old and chubby. What happened to you, 19-year-old-me? When did these wrinkles around my eyes become so pronounced? When did my gut start poking out? When did hair start growing out of my ears and nose at a breakneck speed? When did I start grunting every time I stand up?<\/p>\n

When did YOU become ME?<\/p>\n

Last week I started performing interviews for an assistant. When did I become a professional, conducting interviews and searching for assistants? When did life creep up on me? When did I cross the line from boydom to manhood? It all apparently happened while I was sleeping, unbeknownst to me.<\/p>\n

I thought I was still you, 19-year-old-me. But I\u2019m not you anymore. Now I\u2019m me. And I really, really, miss you. I miss your smooth, unwrinkled face and fluid joints. I miss your ability to eat everything and not gain a pound. I miss your hairless nose and ears. Makes me wonder what else happened while I was sleeping. Have I shrunk a couple inches? Did my IQ drop? If so, HOW WOULD I EVER KNOW?!?!?!? Have my fingernails stopped growing? Do I no longer love duck-billed platypuses? (We can safely rule that one out. I still love them.) This whole aging thing is scary.<\/p>\n

So, how does one age gracefully? Seems like it\u2019s an impossibility to me. An improbable equation. I will most definitely not be aging gracefully, but maybe you can. I will go down into the annals of life kicking and screaming. Of course, it probably won\u2019t last long because I\u2019m sure as I kick I will pull a hamstring while an ensemble of pigs plays Beethoven in the background. But I won\u2019t be able to hear them. My hearing will be gone by then.<\/p>\n

Aging Disgracefully,<\/p>\n

Almost-34-year-old-you<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Dear 19-year-old-me, Last night I played softball for the first time in several years. It wasn\u2019t pretty. And a friend who\u2019s only slightly older than me went down hard with a pulled hamstring. I was not so unfortunate, although my hamstrings are screaming at me today. Which reminds me, who decided to call them hamstrings?<\/p>\n

Read More<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[33,34],"tags":[38,39,114,116],"class_list":["post-1012","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-laugh","category-platypus","tag-aging","tag-aging-gracefully","tag-growing-old","tag-hamstring"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p4mgFO-gk","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/darrenschalk.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1012","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/darrenschalk.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/darrenschalk.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/darrenschalk.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/darrenschalk.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=1012"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"http:\/\/darrenschalk.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1012\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":3638,"href":"http:\/\/darrenschalk.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1012\/revisions\/3638"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/darrenschalk.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=1012"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/darrenschalk.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=1012"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/darrenschalk.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=1012"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}